A great Top Ten List by my buddy Primrose Boynton:


Ten Ways to Know That Your Crew Isn't Being Taken Seriously

10 When your captain welcomes the visiting Admiral aboard the ship, the Admiral rolls his eyes and mutters, "Whatever".
9 Tractor beam, medical staff, etc., doesn't arrive until Tuesday.
8 Your first officer requests a ship's counselor (hoping for Cmdr. Troi). Instead he gets a Ferengi who complains about his cousin Galah (sp?) whenever anyone tries to speak.
7 You pull up to spacedock and they won't let you in without the "Secret Password".
6 You explore strange new worlds, seek out new life and new civilizations, boldly go where no one has gone before ... and nobody cares.
5 When you hang out on Risa, beautiful women in bikinis ignore you.
4 Every day personnel is flooded with requests to be transferred to Klingon cargo vessels.
3 When you look for phasers in the armory, you instead find bananas.
2 Q never visits.
1 You mention resistance and the Borg just laugh.

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